In 2016, Debbie Hayton underwent gender reassignment surgery. Fast forward to today, and Hayton's refusal to validate the standard gender identity orthodoxy has led to excommunication by the trans activist community. What happened?

In a compelling first-hand account of what it means to be a transwoman — and where she feels the impulse comes from — Hayton explains why much of gender identity ideology is, in her view, false and damaging. Once a prominent member of the TUC LGBT+ committee, she charts how her views developed and put her at odds with the majority of trans activists. Instead, she issues a compassionate call to move beyond ideological conflicts, and acknowledge the legitimate concerns that many have with an agenda that asserts that transwomen are women.

Hayton’s honest, humane and moving book shows that by accepting reality, transwomen can live their best lives based on the truth of who they are— rather than the fantasy of who they are not.